At the library

"Are those your children", the librarian asked, as I queued to get our books signed out. I turned briefly, in the hope there was someone else behind me with worse behaved children than mine. No one. I contemplated complete denial, but short of abandoning them, and the books, this wasn't going to fly. "Yes, they're mine"

"Well you know there's no running in the library"

Actually, no, there's no specific signs and you have wide carpeted slopes which are completely irresistible to young children, and we have been in here lots of times, and not been told off before. But yes, of course, it's a library, not a playground.

"Sorry", I said

"Could you please ask them to stop"

I envisaged myself chasing children down a slope, trying to look like I was in control, eventually grabbing one or other so they had to stop, explaining the situation, being ignored, causing a tantrum, or possibly two tantrums, and I took the easy option. May as well admit defeat up front, as everyone was watching now.

"I'm sorry", I said, "but it would be easier if you just signed my books out and we'll leave immediately, otherwise I'm likely to have tantrums and screaming children, and I think that's worse, don't you?". I smiled sweetly (desperately).

Luckily at this point another librarian spontaneously told the children not to run, and the unknown potential power of a stranger turned them into obedient creatures for a moment.

"That'll be $5.60 please" the first librarian said. (They only charge 20 cents per day in late fees)

"Sorry", I said, again "we don't get here very often, for obvious reasons..."

As we left, Michael requested a carry. I gave him two options; the pushchair or walking options, and he chose the laying down on the floor option instead. I walked up the slope with Holly and just out of his view, in the hope that the potential loss of mummy would return the power to his legs, but no, he knows I'll never really leave him. It took more quiet direction from the librarian and he walked obediently up the slope. Oh, to have such control over my children....

We have had an on again, off again relationship with the library over the last few years. They do a great half hour of stories, music and craft for the children three days a week during school term, and I have taken one or other children over time. I tried taking both, but together they cannot resist the lure of the slopes and steps, and together they cannot remember to keep quiet. I was brought up in a time and place where libraries really were quiet places and I'm well aware that some people are there to study or read in peace, so my instinct is to keep the children quiet and still. To a large extent, I fail, and I therefore find our library sessions rather stressful.

Having said that, on a Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday morning between 10am and 11am, the library is full of children and it is definitely not quiet. I guess I have assumed the rules are not as strict as they used to be, and I sense a tension between the old school librarians and those who do the kids' sessions which bring chaos to a place of natural order.

Personally, I think that the more exposure children have to books and reading, the more likely they are to develop a love of reading themselves. Letting them explore a library and read some books with mummy until we decide which ones to take home, is great. They just can't be expected to control their natural exuberance for very long.

I came to the conclusion today, that we should have separate children's libraries, with the usual supply of books and videos or DVDs, plus space for reading sessions, and a play area where those who cannot be contained, can be free to climb and run and shout, while mum gets the books. The basic rules can still be there - no running or shouting in the book area, but everyone involved would have enough contact with kids to know that it's hard for them, and us, so the rules are there to teach us how to progress to the big library, and not to make us feel bad.

In the meantime, I have decided that if I return to the library with the kids, it needs to be between 10 and 11 on a Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday, when hopefully my children can blend in with the 20 or so other children who are oblivious to library rules and regulations, and just there to have fun.