Children's music

I've just dropped the kids at pre-school and occasional care, and realised as I was pulling in the driveway that I had just listened to Hi-5 for the 10 minute journey home, alone. Does this show:

a) It's not that bad and I actually quite like Hi-5,
b) I have been conditioned so well by the children that I automatically choose their music over mine, or
c) I have trained myself to ignore it and just haven't heard it.

I think it might actually be a mixture of all three. I don't mind the music, I aim for peace in the car and if Hi-5 gets me that, then so be it. And I can largely ignore it if I have something I need to think about. I have learnt to zone out, as it were.

The other half, however, is not able to do this. He really, actively, dislikes having children's music in the car. I did not realise the extent of his dislike until a 20 minute trip to the gym a couple of weeks ago. Dad got the kids into the car, and there was Holly armed with her Hi-5 CD, ready to go. 'If you want me to come with you', Dad said, 'There is no Hi-5 in the car. You can choose, Hi-5, or Daddy'.

Unfortunately, Holly chose Hi-5, and I realised the other half was not joking, when he removed his gym bag and went to the other car. Having established that he was deadly serious, I tried to contain my feelings, and told him we were not going to let a 4 year old dictate that we take two cars instead of one, when it is completely unnecessary. I explained to the children that Daddy does not like children's music, and for the first 10 minutes of the journey we had tears and screams and thrashing in the back. Oh joy.

A slight compromise was reached and we were allowed to put the radio on. I picked my choice of music (Mix 106.5 in this case) and we managed to maintain a veneer of peace for the rest of the journey.

Personally, I was feeling slightly mad at the other half. He spends 5 days a week in his car going to and from work, listening to exactly what he wants to on the radio. Why, for 2 days of car trips (and it's not like we go far) could he not just let the children choose the music? After all, Hi-5 is not that bad (at least it's one step up from the Wiggles or Nursery Rhymes). Also, I think it is good for the kids to enjoy music, and the words and content are far more appropriate to their age group than any grown up songs we might choose. And, we grown ups are actually able to talk to each other as we drive, if the kids are happy listening to music.

But no, it was not to be. I fumed quietly for a few minutes, but then thought about my reaction to the other half's choice of music. He likes music that in my mind is too loud, music you can't hear the words to, and wouldn't want to if you could. Hard core rock. And I can't listen to it, especially in the car. It is music that needs space. So, we don't listen to that type of music when we take a trip. We compromise with some gentler options, often provided by the other half's best mate, who has a wider taste in music, but is his mate, so is approved. My choice of the Australian Idol winner doesn't cut it.

Also, let's think about who's in charge. The kids, or the adults. It's debatable on a lot of occasions, but ultimately, we can choose to be the boss.

So, towards the end of the trip, I talked to the kids again. 'Daddy really doesn't like children's music', I explained, 'so when Daddy is in the car, we can't listen to Hi-5 or any other children's music. But, when Mummy is driving during the week, you can choose the music. Daddy has lots of CDs at home, so next time we go out, we'll choose some of Daddy's music to take with us.'

This was accepted amazingly easily, and has been implemented ever since. I did take the kids to the gym at the weekend without Dad, and Holly's reaction was 'Good, we can listen to my music.', but generally there have been no complaints.

In fact when we finished that original trip, having listened to Mummy's music on the radio for most of the way, the kids both declared they didn't like Mummy's music, and wanted Daddy's music in the car next time.